Correction/Téléréalité

Correction/Téléréalité
Message de sarah98 posté le 15-11-2014 à 19:49:38 (S | E | F)
Bonjour
pour lundi je dois faire une rédaction; le sujet est le suivant : vous voulez participer à une émission de téléréalité. Vous en parlez à un de vos parents qui n'est pas d'accord.
Pouvez-vous corriger mes éventuelles fautes s'il vous plaît? Merci d'avance.

Me: hello mom how are you ?
Mom : I'm fine and you ?
Me : that is all for now. I would like to talk to you about something
mom: I'm listening
me : I want to participate in the show : secret story
mom: you sure you're okay ?
Me: mom I'm serious
mom : there than people without brain involved in these programs Is a weak emission.
Me : anything this show is too good! It's just that you is too big for you to understand me !
Mom : at your age I was thinking to work and succeed in my life .
Me : my goal is to win this show I will not have to work or look for work I will be the richest .
mom: who told you that you will win? My daughter you are smart do not do that . I'm your mother I know that there are best for you.
Me:I am aware that I will make mom.
mom : no you are naive you are not going to participate in this show end of discussion
me: please mom I'm great . I'm 20 years old I responsable
mom:yes you are right you are responsible: responsible for your choses.
Me : ouff okay mom you win I will not participate in this tv program.

Merci d'avance de prendre du temps pour corriger.

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Modifié par lucile83 le 15-11-2014 21:32

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Réponse: Correction/Téléréalité de notrepere, postée le 15-11-2014 à 23:30:30 (S | E)
Bonjour

Ponctuation manquante....

Me: hello mom how are you ?
Mom : I'm fine and you ?
Me : that is all for now (cela ne se dit au début de la conversation). I would like to talk to you about something
mom: I'm listening
me : I want to participate in the show "secret story"

mom: you sure you're okay ?
Me: mom I'm serious
mom : there than people without brain involved in these programs Is a weak emission.(Cette phrase n'a aucun sens)
Me : If anything this show is too good! It's just that you is(accorde) too big(mal dit) for you to understand me !
Mom : at your age I was thinking to work and succeed (thinking of + v-ing or v-ing) in my life .
Me : my goal is to win this show I will not have to work or look for work I will be rich .
mom: who told you that you will win? My daughter you are smart do not do that . I'm your mother I know that there are best for you.
Me:I am aware that I will make mom (cela n'a aucun sens).
mom : no you are naive you are not going to participate in this show end of discussion
me: please mom I'm great . I'm 20 years old I responsable(orthographe)
mom:yes you are right you are responsible: responsible for your choses(orthographe).
Me : ouff okay mom you win I will not participate in this tv program(programme ).

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